Not sure if I might be gay?

So its been a little while since I broke uo with my first ever girlfriend. Over time i began to realize she was ugly to me. I know it sounds mean but I needed a first girlfriend and we both liked eavh other at the time. I was not ready to have sex and while I was in the stage of not finding her attractive, she got me to have sex with her. It was terrible. I was forcing myself to and I didn't even find myself physically attracted to her. I'm guessing thats why the sex was bad. We tried 2 other times but it only got worse. I kept wanting to break up but felt as though I couldn't. I just kept on looking at her flaws. Yet I tried to stay with her. This is the part that scares me. She finally showed me her vagina (she was self conscience of it before) and I was horrified. It was all hanging out and just not attractive. I cant tell if this terrible experience with a girl is just traumatizing me or if I really am gay. I'm not grossed out by penises like most guys are. And the only reason I could say I enjoy looking at them is cuz I have one and I'm like sharing the experienxe if that nakes sense. It ive never ever had sexual desires or fantasies with a guy. I've recently been feeling unattraced physically to women but i feel like the terrible experience with ny ex is the problem. Im going to give it time and see how things pkay out. But i am just paranoid that I'm gay. But I strongly believe my terrible first time and the quick realization that my girlfriend was ugly to my eyes. I could just be traumatized.