Bar exam and life help.?

Would somebody please help me and give me some study/life advice? I just received my J.D. and am currently studying for the Virginia Bar exam. I’m not back in Virginia though; I’m still living where I went to law school and to be honest I’m struggling. I’m keeping up with the lectures and I’m doing tons of MBE problems a night, but I feel like I’m slacking on my outlining and essay practice. Funny thing is I’m doing that work too. I’m just so f…ing scared. No matter how hard I work and study there is always this voice in the back of my head tell me that I’m not studying right….that I’m going to fail. I’m really considering just running away from this exam. I’ve never wanted to run away from anything in my life, but I don’t want this. I’m angry all the time. I’ve been having panic attacks. I’ve relapsed into drink again. It’s just ridiculous and the weird thing is that I have no ambition of pursuing a legal career. Like I said I don’t quit anything I start, so when I had this realization a year ago it was already to late to drop out so I don’t need a then why did you go to law school?...response. I don’t know what I’m going to do if I fail this thing. It’ll devastate me and I won’t ever take it again. I don’t think I’m in the right frame of mind to take it. What should I do? Any study advice? Any life advice?